#35 When you grow up poor…

… you’ll build an airplane in the driveway made out of scrap wood and plastic from a constructions site, even though your Dad says that if you touch his hammers he’ll throw your toys away because “why should you have toys if you’re just gonna play with other people’s stuff?”

You’ll hammer a nail wrong and when you try and pull it out your (Dad’s) hammer will slip and catch your forehead with the claw end. By the time you realize what’s happened blood will be in your socks and you’ll be screaming up the stairs yelling for your mother.

She’ll pick you up and yell back at you demanding that you “don’t bleed on my new carpet!” and then drop you in the bath tub while she calls a doctor.

You’ll get stitches. No big deal. That airplane was stupid anyways.

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